Hotdogs and Homeward Bound - CH 5 of Being Thuperman

Leaving the airport, Mom headed back down Cicero Avenue. It was approaching noon so, she asked if we were hungry. Two eight year old kids are almost always going to be hungry. Why did she bother to ask? The only times I could recall ever being unable to eat anything more were the usual suspect holiday celebrations of gluttony, Thanksgiving and Christmas.

She suggested we stop for hotdogs, a place she'd taken me before. I wasn't sure Sandra knew the place, but I promised her the hotdogs were amazing. Mainly I think she wanted to stop somewhere to say she'd really been to Chicago, as in setting feet on the ground. In the days ahead I'd learn she didn't feel she'd been somewhere until that happened.

Upon stopping at the restaurant, the first thing all of us had to do was hit the restrooms. Even if we hadn't needed to go as badly as we did, Mom would have insisted, as she always did, that we wash our hands. When I emerged, I waited for Mom and Sandra to emerge from the ladies room. Again, I reminded myself to ask Sandra why it took girls a lot longer than boys to use the restroom? By the time the ladies came out, I'd forgotten all about asking, though. Already, I'd decided I wanted chilidogs.

Over the years I've heard people say some bad things about hotdogs, especially what ends up being put into them. But it's hard to mess up cooking one, unless you burn it on a grill or something. I'm not sure why but the dogs that day tasted better than any I had ever had up to that point in my life. Each of us ate two. Mom said I wolfed mine down which conjured an image that made me smile. I pictured a cartoon character – a wolf – licking his chops after consuming something tasty. I could imagine my tongue slapping my eyebrows.

"You happy now?" Mom asked.

As I finished chewing the last bite I nodded. Then, after swallowing, I confirmed, "That hit the spot!"

Sandra thanked Mom for lunch and agreed the hotdogs were good. Maybe it's just we were that hungry. When my belly button felt like it was stuck to my backbone, little else compared to something as quick and satisfying as a hotdog. Although she said nothing directly, I figured Sandra was in similar straights after driving for over two and a half hours. She never ate a big breakfast.

On the way home, Mom switched the radio to her kind of music, which, as I said before, didn’t interest Sandra or me. We played with our handheld games for a while, until once again I started getting a little car sick. Then, Sandra continued playing Punch-Buggy, extending her considerable lead in points. Although she didn't punch my arm all that hard, it was hurting from the multiple impacts of her fist. Not that it ended the game, I conceded she'd win.

While she continued to watch the oncoming traffic, I picked up her map which I'd left open on the seat between us. It seemed different to me, just a little. After what Sandra said about her rules and all, I had tried to commit it to memory. Some things seemed changed. The more I looked at it, the more I was certain of it. I started to point those out to her when she diverted my attention, pointing out particularly funny billboard graffiti regarding fast food with an arrow pointing to a sign next to it about weight loss. We both laughed. And so, for a while we continued playing Punch-Buggy while we also looked for funny signs.

After riding in the back seat all the way from the hotdog place to my house, I really needed to go to the bathroom again. Sandra called dibs on the downstairs washroom. I ran upstairs. Afterwards, Sandra came to my room and we continued talking about her map.

"I was thinking," she started. "A map can be sort of like a maze, right?"

"I suppose so."

"What if I make the map into a maze and only you and I are the ones who can figure out."

"That would be really cool," I said. "But I think other people will still figure it out."

"Yeah, but it will be hard for them, unless they're as good with mazes as we are."

"Or know the trick you showed me. That's the only reason I'm good, now."

"It's a perfect way to make a treasure map," she said.

"Do you have treasure you need to bury somewhere?"

"Not yet. Do you?"

"I have fourteen cents." I admitted with a smile. "I'm keeping the four cents I found hoping to find another penny so I can trade that for a nickel - cause pennies are useless otherwise."

"Yeah, they are. I have six dollars and fifty-six cents. If you give me your pennies I'll give you my nickel."

"I'll own you a penny, then."

"We'll find one eventually, you can give me the next one you find, unless it's laying heads-up, of course."

In case no one ever told you about lucky pennies, here it is. If a penny is head's up when you find it, you keep it for the good luck. Head's down, you give away immediately, like to the next person you see because the luck will only work for them.

Anyway, it was a deal, so afterwards, I had fifteen cents and she had six dollars and fifty-five cents.

Mom called upstairs to ask if I could give her my dirty laundry. Of course, I had to scramble to pick up the things that needed to be washed. As she sat at my desk, Sandra laughed at the sight o me running around, getting down on all fours to look under my bed and opening my closet.

"You could help," I suggested.

"I don't want to touch your smelly socks and dirty underwear!"

"They aren't that bad."

"Maybe not to you."

"Don't ever ask me to help you then."

"When have you ever been in my room and it wasn't clean?"

I shrugged.

"'Never' is the word you're looking for."

"You clean your room everyday. I clean mine once in a while – mostly whenever Mom reminds me."

"She shouldn't have to. It's easier if you clean it as you go."

"Well, I'm lazy, I guess."

"I've noticed. You're a lot like Spike," referring to her teenage brother.

"I'm nothing like him."

"You are as far as being lazy."

Having stuffed everything into the laundry that hung by its string from the bed post at the footboard, I snatched it up and ran it out into the hallway and dropped it down to Mom's awaiting arms. "Did you make your bed?" she asked.

"I'll do it."

"How can you invite Sandra into your room when it's all messy?"

"She's sort of used to it by now, Mom."

When I returned to my room, Sandra was laughing.

"I feel like I'm trapped between you and my mom telling me how bad I am. It's just I have other priorities."

"I know," Sandra said as she was drawing a new map.

"That's a new one?"

"I'm making it into a maze, like we talked about," she explained. I didn't dare look over her shoulder while she worked. She hated that. So, I went ahead and made my bed and put my toys in the toy box because I figured Mom would come upstairs to inspect in a few minutes – as soon as she put the dirty clothes into wash.

Anytime Sandra was in my room, Mom came upstairs to check on us. Sandra said it was to make sure the door was open, like her mom did whenever we were there and especially when Spike had a girlfriend over. Both of our moms made it seem like she was checking on something else, but really she was making sure we were playing normal stuff, not doctor. I had no interest in becoming a doctor and Sandra didn't want to pretend she was sick.

Sandra finished the new map and held it up for me to look. It looked really complicated until she showed me the trick of solving it. Then, it was pretty easy to figure out. So, already I knew how to find my way through it.

"Wouldn't it be cool if we could build a maze exactly like this?" I asked.

"You mean a world where the lines on the map are walls?"

"Yeah."

"This is a map for a world, remember?"

"Yeah? What's the world called?"

"Sandra and Will's world. I get top billing because I drew it."

"It was kind of my idea, though."

"You can all it Will and Sandra's world when you talk about it, then."

"What will other people call it?"

"Whatever they want to call it. I don’t care. I'll call it what I want to call it," she said defiantly. "Anyway, only people I know and like are going to know about it, so they'll probably call it what I call it, right?"

"A map of the new world that's also a maze," I said, then suggested calling it 'Amazing World'.

"That's a pun."

"Is it?" I asked.

"Spike doesn't allow me to use puns. He says they’re the lowest form of humor."

"So, is Spike going to be in on this world?"

"Not necessarily," she said. "So far, only you and I know about it. We could keep it that way, I suppose. So, we can call it Amazing World for a while, at least."

"Maybe we don't have to tell anybody about the world forever." For a long time, that's how it worked out.

The map started at the middle. As was the case with the other map, that was the faerie castle in her bedroom at her house. My room was also on the map, of course. Then, as the maze progressed further from the center, there were the arcade and the convenience store on the way to our school – which thankfully was out of session for the summer. Past the school building there were the other kids hangouts in the neighborhood, like the Patrick's Pizza Parlor – I'm not sure what prompted an Irish guy named Patrick Duffy to start a pizza place but it was a pretty good place to eat - and Jerry's Big Burger which was directly across the street.

Further out on the map was downtown Normal where Bud's Hardware was. Sandra and I went there sometimes. We'd park our bikes in the rack out front and lock them together so no one would steal them. Once inside, sometimes we'd do chores, like sweeping the floors and taking out the trash. Sandra's dad would pay us because we were helping him out doing things he hated doing.

Toward the edge of the paper on which the map/maze was drawn was the edge of town. Pointing out the maze exit was exactly where one of the roads led away from the city toward my grandparent's farm, I said, "We really have to make it over on bigger paper, and maybe make the lines on the maze smaller."

"Not really. It will move along with you."

"How's it supposed to do that?"

"That's the magic part. Once I make a copy of this with dad's copier, it will be transformed like the other one was."

"That's how it works?"

"Yeah," she confirmed with a smile. "You see, the faeries have to be able to use it, too. So, when I shrink down to their size, it has to come along with me, right?"

"I guess."

"It has to be magic, then. Otherwise, that wouldn't work at all."

"What about the other map? What are we going to do with that?"

"This is the same as the other map, just I put a maze around everything."

"We have to find different places as we solve the maze, then?"

"Exactly."

"I like this." I patted her on the back. "This will be fun."

As if on cue, Mom arrived at my door, checked my bed and ensured I hadn't hidden any piles of dirty clothes in the closet or under the bed. Fortunately, I hadn't. Since the last time I got caught and was grounded, I hadn't done anything like that. "You need to take out your trash." She observed.

"It’s not full yet."

"It doesn't have to be full to empty it."

"I'll bring it down later."

"What are you two up to?"

"Sandra's making a map/maze."

"A what?"

"I'm making a map of the world and drawing a maze over it." She handed the map to Mom.

"This is really creative, Sandra."

"It was kind of Will's idea, too."

"So you can pretend you're in the maze when you're going places around town."

"Sort of," I confirmed.

"I kind of got the idea from some of the video games I play," Sandra explained.

"Okay." Mom returned the map to Sandra. "You have quite an imagination - both of you."

"Can I go down to Sandra's house?" I asked. Not that Sandra was in any way ready to go, but I was getting ready for later on.

"You need to be back before dinner."

"Mom will want Will to stay for dinner since you fed me for lunch."

"Can I, Mom?"

"It's may I."

"May I?"

"You need to be home before dark, then. Before eight o'clock so you can take a bath and be ready for bed. And make sure you take the trash out first. Tomorrow is collection day. So, since Dad's away, you need to take it out to the curb."

"Yes, Mom."